Life is… Edgy and Scary

One of the advantages of having a full time job is that you learn to value your free time, although it does occasionally make you regret not using that time to the fullest.  I guess a large proportion of my real "free" time recently has been taken up with thinking, and I certainly don’t consider that time wasted.

I’ve had a lot to think about, I suppose, what with Alison walking out on me and my new job, as well as George’s treatment and other friends/family related issues.  I guess I could say that I’ve been properly sad for the first time in absolutely ages, and I genuinely feel a little lonely.  Don’t get me wrong - it’s nothing dramatic.  I’ve been in a state of flux for a while now - constantly up and down.  Usually towards the end of the day I feel wistful, but I haven’t been really miserable since I was ill.

I don’t think many people read this blog, but for those who do, I’d like you to know that I’m grateful for your interest despite my recent egocentricity.  To fill you in, Alison and I have not been speaking for a while now - mostly because I found I couldn’t handle her continued company - although I do think about her a lot.  I know that she reads this and I want her to know that I miss her, but that I just can’t compromise any more.  It’s bloody hard dealing with this sort of thing at the best of times…

Hey-ho.  It’s at times like these when you really value your support network, and I thank you if you consider yourself part of mine.  Likewise, if you clearly don’t form any link in my chain, bugger off and go and pester someone else!  You pesky critters…

Many thanks to the well-wishers.  Things are better now.  I won’t go into details because it’s late and I have to get to work tomorrow, but suffice to say I’m feeling much better than I did a couple of weeks ago.  Hope everyone else is doing just fine.  Big cheer to George, who is kicking that Cancer’s lily ass as we speak.